Divorced for 2 yrs, ready to date, but still carry a big finacial burden from the divorce, how do I approach?

Ex left me in a big hole..quit job, moved to parents, spent $, racked up%26gt;debt, lied about %26gt; debt before marriage. Whatever legal muck, I have a job, make a good income, was thus awarded this large debt. (OVER IT, NO comments on this please)

Been through the credit, debt stuff. I make ends meet, make my sacrifices. Still 6-7 yrs to pay off, no harm to credit, can still send flowers



I am ready to meet somebody or date seriously. In my mid-30's/ My experience: the finacial situation does make a difference. Many women who have never been married focused on career and thus seek a finacial =... more than I have now. Divorced, well.. most made out pretty well %26amp; are very weary as to debt, and are ready to party w/ divorce settlement, carry bags and own weigh. Women w/ kids, never dated 1 yet, but many personals read: "looking for economic security" understandable.



Not a good pickup line, but don't want to hide it. Who are the exceptions to the above, So how do I know/address this issue?

Divorced for 2 yrs, ready to date, but still carry a big finacial burden from the divorce, how do I approach?
If you are looking for a solid mature relationship then being honest and telling the truth from the very start will help you weed out the females who are only looking for a "meal ticket". There are plenty of females who would be charmed by a man who can be honest about his financial situation from the start. Good luck.
Reply:Ok, here is my two cents.....lie.



You sound too honest, and let's face it....by the time you find someone and get serious, you're going to be out of your financial hole. Everyone who has ever been through a divorce is going to "assume" that your credit is in the toilet, or just barely making its way out.



Go out and have fun. There is no reason to discuss your finances. If it comes up, just say you're thrifty....or say that you're doing your part for the environment.....you don't have to show your checkbook balance when you pick up a date for the evening.



And be creative.....find a local (and free) late night movie in the park....plan a picnic basket and sit on a blanket. women love that romantic stuff anyway....I'd rather have something like that than a couple hundred spent on a fancy dinner in a crowded restaurant.



Good luck in getting back out there.
Reply:Stop reading the personal ads for one honey and get out and live a little. The people you meet in those ads that write such crap are usually after nothing but money anyway. Do you really want to go through that again? You've been there and done that and look where it got you? I say let your financial affairs be your business until you meet someone worthy of sharing the baggage with. No sense in laying all your cards out on the table and wearing your heart on your sleeve while you search for love. If you do that, you'll never find it...even when you're out of debt.



The way I see it, money doesn't make the world go round....people do. And if you find someone that is only interested in money, then they aren't really interested in you are they? Money can buy you alot of things honey when you have it...but it can't buy you happiness and quite honestly, that is what you need right now. Someone who loves and appreciates you for who you are. For richer or for poorer, sickness and in health. And if you continue to be the honest soul you are, in time it'll happen. Just not as a result from a personal ad.
Reply:It takes two people working together nowdays to make ends meet.Most women understand this and don't expect to marry for money.

Be upfront about your situation and there are good women out there who will understand.You won't be in debt forever. and your credit is still good which is important for you.

Always be honest.It will get you far.

Good Luck.
Reply:If people are shopping for a mate the way they shop for a house or a car (personal ads etc...) then yeah, maybe it'll make a big difference whether you are in good financial shape. Not everybody thinks that way though, and I'm not sure I'd have wanted to date someone who was looking at me as a commodity or investment or something.



Sometimes you just meet people and fall in love, and the financial situation just is what it is, good or bad, and you deal with it in the most fair way you can figure out. When my husband and I first started dating, he was paying exhorbitant child support for 3 kids when 2 of them were living with him and they were eating a lot of ramen noodles to get by. I never for a second thought, "Hmmm, he's not financially secure. I guess maybe I don't like him after all." Mind you, I was 26, not 30something, but I hope I never start thinking about people that way.

Teeth Whitening