Your opinion of this poem I wrote?

And is it a sonnet? It has 14 lines, but the meter and rhyme schemes are not the usual ones for a sonnet.



A Lover's View



If sweets could make her sweeter

I'd give her sweets.

She needs no sweets.

If flowers would make her fairer

I'd send my garden's bower,

Yet her beauty no ornaments from flowers lacks.

If with suave ointments, her complexion would take

A purer, rosier hue

I'd send a few;

But none could even a slight addition make.

If any enhancement of loveliness to loveliness were due

I'd pledge my every worth to make it true;

But nothing would, by any circumspection,

Serve to increase what is now perfection.

Your opinion of this poem I wrote?
I think it's cool. Good job
Reply:wow u did a very good job.very nice.the one to whom u gives this is really lucky.wow ur words are beautiful.i am reading this the umpteenth time.wow very gud job
Reply:It's actually pretty good. I know sometimes in poetry, sentences are sometimes akwardly worded, but I still can't make sense of "Yet her beauty no ornaments from flowers lacks." I would think about revising this line. Other than that, the poem is pretty good and the title fits great as well. Good luck.
Reply:I had a difficult time reading it...it's interesting however it really didn't flow for me. Sorry.
Reply:i think your the poem is for a girl who eludes you,

the feeling is so intense that you were able to express your emotions this far,

i suggest give this poem to her in an old fashioned way of writing, matching with special effects with today's technology, like using photoshop or any software related enhancement in getting good background,

for sure, she will not repel to you again and this will make her want you in the middle of the night!!!
Reply:Is she pretty?
Reply:this is poetry written for the poetry romantic....good work .....keep writing and making someone like me (a dead person) feel alive for the 2 min. it took to read.......
Reply:I'm sure it means alot more to you than anyone else good luck
Reply:It is an exceptionally good love poem, and I think it is a sonnet, but it doesn't matter. I can only describe excellent in conception, warm and moving in tone, near-perfect in form, and masterful in execution.
Reply:Wow thats really good, if you're not a poet you should consider becoming one, if thats for your girlfriend/wife you might get lucky (wink,wink) with that poem.
Reply:I love it! It's words are beautiful. You have talent. You should send your poem to try to get published I think.